Friday, April 17, 2009

Grooms, take your number one girl out - that's MOM in case you were wondering

Guys, I want you to do something for me. This week, make a date with the number one girl in your life. Nope…not the future Mrs., the original Mrs. in your life – your mom. Now I’m sure I’m getting mixed reaction here. Trust me, if you do this, you will create a memory that she will hold as dear as the first time she held you in her arms.

Lunch or dinner, maybe a movie, or even a burger and a beer; just some time with her – just the two of you during your engagement. Sometimes I think it’s you the grooms, as well as the MOG (mother of the groom) that may feel a bit left out. All the fuss seems to be around the bride, and that’s fine. More than that, if you have a relationship with your mom (no matter if it’s your mom, grandmother, step-mother, foster mother or other mother-figure) she sees the man that you are, but her heart see the little boy you were.

Recently, I had an opportunity to spend time with my own family. They are a good crew and we are a very close family. We have as much fun around the dinner table as we do watching a movie or the basketball game. I watch the way my own father dotes on me, and my mom dotes on my brother. It’s both funny and sweet. I know that my brother and I both try to spend ‘alone time’ with our respective parent (me – a total daddy’s girl…yes love mom tons too, but dad and I are both just silly together - we play phone tag during the NBA playoffs and Dancing with the Stars). It got me thinking about being a parent and what my own expectations will someday be.

I don’t have a child…yet…but I’m sure of one thing. There is an enigmatic relationship between mother and son. Yes father and daughter too, but that’s another article. You may not realize it and no matter how much your mom likes, dare I say loves your fiancée, she is quickly having to come to terms with the fact that she won’t be your number one girl anymore. It’s a time with a lot going on and your mom may feel a bit left out. Even more so once you are pronounced, husband and wife.

If you think I’m kidding, tell your mom you want to have a date with her, and watch her face light up. A mom won’t necessarily tell you this is how she feels – so I will. That’s my job right?

You are her son, her pride and joy. No matter if you are first born or the 19th child she has. You are the one that has given her both joy and frustration. She wouldn't change a thing, so trust me on your wedding day, she will have feelings as mixed as the father of the bride. She gave you life, helped shape you into the man you are and while she knows you love her, why not take some time to show her - now. Spend a day – just the two of you. Focus on her, do something, anything or nothing special at all. Make this your own special “Mother’s Day”, and maybe you can make it your own yearly ritual.

I want you to remember, you may one day be a dad…and won’t you want that one last ‘special’ day just you and your little girl? Creating a day for your mom when she isn’t expecting it ,will be something that she will forever hold close to her heart. After all you are that to her…her pride and joy, her heart.

Love to you,
Your Bridal Fairy-Godmother.


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